March marks the one year anniversary of the pandemic’s most significant initial impact on the United States. That’s just over 365 days since we have worked inside the walls of an office, hugged our friends, gone on vacation, or been to a concert. If the weight of this past year has taken a toll on you – you are not alone.
Psychologists specializing in trauma describe anniversaries of all types as significant. This is because our bodies and brains are believed to store memories that can be triggered by certain dates or seasons. The one year anniversary of the pandemic is no exception.
Reactions to grief and loss anniversaries is normal and acknowledging them is healthy. One concrete way to do this is to practice self-reflection.
What is self-reflection?
Self-reflection can take place independently or as a part of therapy. It is defined as a cognitive process that helps identify and define values, feelings, thoughts, and behavioral patterns. Reflection is often using in academic settings in order to pause and consider the best way to understand and approach a problem. Similarly, self-reflection allows us the ability to determine the impact of events, our own responses to them, and whether those responses are in line with what we value in our life.
Self-reflection prompts
Often times, it is useful to use journaling prompts to initiate the process of self-reflection. Here are some suggestions that we encourage our patients to write about when it comes to specifically reviewing the last year:
- Write about your happiest memory in the past year. What was the feeling you can remember? Was anyone there with you?
- Write about a difficult memory in the past year. What was the way you coped with that situation? Is that coping style a pattern for you?
- Choose a time in your childhood that you can remember as being challenging. Write a letter to yourself at that age. What do you want him or her to know about your life now? What would yourself to know about this past year?
- What have your emotions this year taught you? For example, if you experience anxiety, what has your anxiety taught you about yourself?
- Write a list of three things you did in the past 12 months that you never expected to accomplish during a pandemic.
The benefits of self-reflection
Without taking time for self-reflection, we run the risk of operating on auto-pilot. A lack of introspection can lead to repetition of maladaptive patterns or continuing to do the same thing even when it is not going well.
There are documented benefits of self-reflection. Here are just a few:
- Respond with intention
Sometimes, we respond in knee-jerk ways that reflect old patterns especially when it comes to situations that bring about emotions. Self-reflection requires the intentional consideration of actions and words. You may find yourself feeling in greater control of your reactions with the ability to consider the best and most effective ways to respond.
- Gain perspective
We live in a face-paced world with may demands on our time. Taking time for self-reflection provides an opportunity to think deeply about our thoughts, actions, and behaviors. It allows us to consider how we spend our time and that can give rise to altering proprieties and setting healthy boundaries.
- Identify values
Our core values are unique to us. They determine what is really important and meaningful. Values are like a compass and engaging in ways that align with those values tends to bring joy and contentment. But what if we don’t know what our values are? Self-reflection is the first step in the process of value-identification.
When we fail to spend time reflecting, we miss out on the opportunity to acknowledge growth and progress. We also miss out on the chance modify or change our behavior to align with a value-driven life. March marks the 12-month anniversary of the pandemic and in the past year we have had to miss out on a lot. Let’s not allow the opportunity to self-reflect slip away.